A life without you
A year has gone without my dad. 365 days of walking around with a void in my chest. A year without hearing him again. Though I see him a lot in my dreams, in my thoughts, in my photo books, in my memories, I miss listening to his sound of laugh and all his jokes. I miss hearing him calling out my name and still telling him-Arey daddy aapko kuch bhi nhi aata. His voice was all that could uplift me and made me feel so special.
As the months are going away I am recollecting if I have done enough for you? If I have given my best to make you happy in your lifetime? If I have pampered with enough gifts. Being from typical Indian family all I regret is that we have never hugged each other. It was either a light pat from him on my shoulder or just a tight handshake or a loud hi five. Why was I so shy to hug you dad?
There are times I do feel jealous seeing other’s dad and kids still together. Oh yes, I am being honest here I do feel jealous and lot angry and then a tear of wound will drop from my eyes-hu was my happy picture picked to remain incomplete?
What angers me the most is people asking me-how is your mom deepika? It piss me so much because it reminds me of the puzzle piece is missing from family board. Why can’t you people still treat us as complete family and still ask-how are your parents?
I mourn for you everyday and all that joys you were robbed of...
I guess I’ll always be partially a little girl missing her dad like crazy and wishing he could swoop in and save the day…
I promise to take your memory along for every part of the ride. I will love you fiercely until I am burned in that same fire. I am forever changed by losing you and yet I only am who I am to begin with because of you. My broken heart is the same one that has loved you since the day I was born. You are forever my king and I am forever your little girl.
We are here for mom and making the most of it with her.
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Previous Anika’s ice cream birthday party Year 2021 have been way relaxing with the invent of covid vaccine. We can breath in peace or atleast meet people who are vaccinated, at the same time still practicing social distancing norms. Last year we celebrated Anika's bday in complete isolation; this year I had the confidence we can invite our close groupies and blow out the candles with loud aplause and song. I didn’t want Anika to miss out all the birthday fun because of all the crazy virus thing going on around us these days and prepared our guest list very carefully inviting only those who are vaccinated. Yes, sometimes i can be a selfish mom because my child's well being comes first. We celebrated our sweet and sticky girl with a sweet and sticky ice cream social birthday party, full of all things delicious and precious, sugar-coated and cute… just like our littlest one. With summer on the roll we decided to go for Ice cream birthday party, packed with ice cream cone cupcakes, cakesicles and a home made cake!WHY DID I PICK THIS THEMEI’m the sort of person who would much rather invest time into decorating, baking than cooking…and so a few weeks before the party, I started collecting ideas from Instagram and Pinterest–our modern-day magazines!I kicked around a few ideas that I thought were cute like unicorn, Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star and Mickey mouse. But when I started coming across Ice Cream party inspiration, I knew deep within my food-loving heart that this was the perfect idea! I mean, come on! Anika is obsessed with ice cream- we all do! She always has a room for dollop of ice cream. Plus I wanted a lot of pastel and confetti this year. INVITATIONI no longer belive in sending invitation by mail rather go paperless and save the trees. All the ease of a digital invite with the thrill that comes from getting real mail with your name on an envelope that opens to reveal a card. I also Watsapp it to many of my relatives living overseas. Thanks to Picasso for making this invitation collage possible. THE CAKEWith these insta birthday party posts I always seem to have a TON of comments and questions asking how I made all of the DIY projects, so I’m going to try my best to go into detail about how I did things and where I sourced things from.Starting from the cake I had total fun inventing the theme cake. Thanks to Pinterest which never fails to give me amazing ideas. I decided to go with red velvet cake from Betty Crockers cake mix. I am bit lazy with the measurements of flour and baking soda and glad they have Cake mix for people like us. The frosting was simple buttercream topped up with candy swirls(made from fondant) and gum balls(store brought). I added some more drama by dripping teal candy melt on the cake, sticking some doughnuts adding an ice cream cake cone to its side. DIY ICE CREAM THEMED DECORI wake up at 7 the morning of her birthday and did half of the balloon garland before she is awake. In the meantime my very good friend Suparna and her husband came to help us with the decor and food. So starting with the setup the backdrop is Ice cream and candy store theme garlanded with pastel balloons both brought from Amazon. I definitely got a great deal at last minute. The table was covered with sequin table runner which I already had from my last year stock in home. The front and sides were covered with Pleated table skirt giving it nice clean look. While we could finish only half of the decor we took break as Anika got up for breakfast. She could sense already that this was a special day and a lot is happening in the house. I had to be very careful she doesn’t go near the balloon garland and had to divert her in other toys. As soon as Anika was done eating her brunch pizza and playing here and there she was so ready for her afternoon nap!!!! Bingo that gave us extra hour to do the remaining stuff. WHAT WAS ON THE CANDY TABLEAnd now for my favorite part of the party … the candy table. Ice cream-shaped cookies – I brought the ice cream-shaped cookie from Amazon and chose to bake it myself since I wanted to try something safe and homemade this year. You can obviously get it premade from your favorite bakery. Glazed doughnuts-the doughnuts were made with the leftover cake batter and glazed with different colour candy melt sprinkled with stars. Chocolate dipped pretzel sticks-These pretzel sticks were super easy to make as well. Just melt some white chocolate wafers, dip in the pretzel rods and drizzle with melted dark chocolate. If you are more creative just go with more ideas by adding a drop or two of food coloring to the candy melt and sprinkles. Ice cream cone cake pops-this was much easier than I anticipated! All you have to do is create a cake ball with leftover pieces of cake trimmings + icing and place it on top of the cake. For the “drip”, I made a white chocolate ganache by melting 1 cup of white chocolate and mixing in about 1/2 cup of warm milk until it was a liquidy consistency (but still on the thicker side). After it cooled for about 10 minutes, I poured it over the cake ball and over the side of the cake. Easy, peasy. I added my cake cone and sprinkles and let it settle before moving it anywhere (it doesn’t really harden, but it kind of freezes in place).Muffins-These cupcakes were store brought and looked little dull and boring so I decided to make it more eye candy by just sticking pocky sticks to the frosting, lucky charm marshmallows and sprinkled with my fave confetti. Super easy and it created a really nice ice cream look. Cakesickles-With little time and so much on my plate I purchased the premade cakesickle from Kroger’s and believe me they taste amazing. Definitely saved my time. Ice cream truck-this truck surely grab attention of all the kids in the party and they could not stop picking the cake cones and muffins from the cart. I was super glad to see that the display was quite a success. THE CELEBRATION The guest start coming in by 5pm and we hurry upstairs to dress up in our best dress. I was more excited to dress up Anika and knot my fingers that she doesn’t scream wearing the bright tutu dress. She definitely did object wearing that huge dress but seeing her toddler friends around I was successful in diverting her attention and quickly pop her inside the dress. Phew! We had a blank wall in one corner which we decided to glam it up with photo collage choosing best of the three years of Anika. SOME MORE CANDID PICS OTHER THINGS YOU CAN DOSet up a DIY ice cream station with different flavors of ice cream, cones, bowls, syrups, and toppings for your kids and their friends so that they can put together their ice cream exactly how they want it!Sweets that look like ice cream – for instance, cut some wafers diagonally, put a bit of icing at the top, stick an oreo on, a little more icing, sprinkles, and a cherry-colored M&M to make oreo-wafer ice cream cones.Fill sundae cups with different sweet, salty, and healthy snack options for your guests!This party was totally a labor of love and it really turned out more beautiful than I could ever have imagined. It was in large part thanks to my dear friend Suparna, who continues to blow me away by bringing my big ideas to life. Shop the birthday dress of Anika from Amazon toddler girl dressThanking Shubhadeep Photography for capturing every moments in best frame.
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